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16371. Jenerator - 8/29/2005 6:45:28 PM My mom is in recovery as we speak.
Her interbody spinal fusion surgery went well according to the neurosurgeon and so we are waiting to see her in about an hour. She has a long recovery period (3 hours), and will be out of it when we see her, but I am relieved that so far so good.
Her back brace is ENORMOUS and so my heart is sad that her life will be greatly altered once she is awake and begins the healing process. She has to wear thebrace for six months!
That said, I am glad she finally got the treatment she needed and that we are blessed to live within proximity of one of the best neurosurgeons in the US!
Anyway, I appreciate all of your kind thoughts and prayers. 16372. wonkers2 - 8/29/2005 7:40:41 PM I hope it turns out well! 16373. thoughtful - 8/29/2005 7:56:30 PM Glad to hear the surgery went well. Back brace is no fun. Will she be in a home or will there be arrangements for home care while she's in the brace? 16374. Jenerator - 8/29/2005 9:11:53 PM She will be staying at home and her best friend is staying with her. If she needs more intensive PT in the future, the doctor said he may book her for treatment at a rehab facility. For now, though, it looks as though she'll be in the hospital until Saturday and then be released home.
I am glad to be working only part-time. 16375. thoughtful - 8/29/2005 9:33:49 PM Oh yes....I'm sure she'll need your help through this...she's fortunate to have you. 16376. Jenerator - 8/29/2005 9:36:08 PM Thank you, thoughtful.
I wish I could do more - the timing for all of this is the pits. I am due on the 20th and as big as a house, so I can't really help that much other than by being present for support.
Her best friend is the real life saver. 16377. arkymalarky - 8/29/2005 10:38:29 PM Wow, Jen, it's great Marshame came through well and has a good prognosis, but it sounds like you both will really have a lot ahead of you over the next few months. 16378. concerned - 8/29/2005 10:51:57 PM Do you believe in Santa Claus?
I. There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per house hold, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each.
II. Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second.
This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second --- 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.
III. The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them --- Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).
IV. 600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second crates enormous air resistance --- this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip. Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to centrifugal forces of 17,500 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.
V. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.
16379. concerned - 8/29/2005 11:45:03 PM I'm considering the use of similar logic to debunk the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. Hey, if one has a need to slaughter sacred cows, one has to go slumming now that LW ideology is dead and buried. 16380. jexster - 8/30/2005 12:30:31 AM "This day have I perfected your religion for you, completed My favour upon you, and have chosen for you Islam as your religion." al-Qur'an 5:3
Where's my Holiday Inn towel!16381. arkymalarky - 8/30/2005 12:49:45 AM Many people I know have done it, gives them a chance to head off to Italy on the pretence of working.
Sounds like a plan! 16382. judithathome - 8/30/2005 12:51:01 AM Her back brace is ENORMOUS and so my heart is sad that her life will be greatly altered once she is awake and begins the healing process. She has to wear thebrace for six months!
Jen, she will not even notice how long she is in this...it is necessary and once it's over, she will be grateful for the fact she is better.
My heart goes out to both of you...your mom will always recall this event and link it to the wonderful birth of you beautiful, healthy daughter.
Good luck to all three of you. And let Dylan be helpful to your mom...both of them will always remember it.
16383. judithathome - 8/30/2005 5:47:32 AM My car is still at the shop....went in at noon today.
'Nuff said. 16384. Magoseph - 8/30/2005 10:18:00 AM We have good news from Jen about her mom and not so good news about Judith's cherished and lovely Jaguar--(I can say that because I saw it almost three years ago, a beautiful sleek machine.)
Hello, Mac! 16385. Macnas - 8/30/2005 1:24:51 PM hello there Mago. 16386. thoughtful - 8/30/2005 3:23:39 PM I'd say sorry, judithah, but anyone who buys a jag knows you have to buy 2...one to drive while the other's in the shop! 16387. PelleNilsson - 8/30/2005 3:30:44 PM And a third one to cannibalize for spare parts. 16388. Ms. No - 8/30/2005 3:58:10 PM Hell, I just need one to have a muscular cabanna boy wash in the driveway. 16389. Ms. No - 8/30/2005 3:58:45 PM please ignore superfluous consonants. 16390. Magoseph - 8/30/2005 4:14:10 PM That last sentence had me laughing out loud, Ms. No. When you have a sec, go to Good Life and see my sons lake room's improvements so far.
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