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18158. wonkers2 - 1/10/2006 8:17:56 PM I'm not sure its necessarily a male-female issue. I have experiences with my spouse that are similar to those described by thoughtful and magoseph, above. (And I'm sure my spouse would say the same about her experiences with me.) 18159. thoughtful - 1/10/2006 8:34:13 PM Now there are times when not only is it appropriate but appreciated to question me, and when he does i'm thankful...mainly because I'm an airhead. I will often leave for the store without the shopping list, head for the car without the keys and other such distractions so comments like, did you remember to lock the door, did you bring your measuring tape, etc. are all appreciated. I know I'm an airhead about such things and I deserve to be second guessed in those instances. 18160. wonkers2 - 1/10/2006 9:11:36 PM I plead to backseat driving when my wife is at the wheel. But that's because I'm so much better a driver than she. For example, on a freeway she often waits too late to get into the right-hand exit lane, whereas I plan ahead and avoid a last minute Perils of Pauline exit across several lanes. Also, I speed up when I'm changing lanes and she brakes before changing lanes thus entering the new lane going too slow and annoying the cars behind her in the new lane. These are but a few examples. I could easily go on. (I will give her credit for being a careful driver with an accident free record.) 18161. PelleNilsson - 1/10/2006 9:19:12 PM The fact is that women never cease to try to "improve" their men. 18162. thoughtful - 1/10/2006 10:06:09 PM That's true Pelle, and by the time hubby's in the grave, he ought to be just about perfect!
I can hear it now, "Dang! Just when I got him perfect, he up and dies on me!" 18163. Ms. No - 1/10/2006 11:02:41 PM I will give her credit for being a careful driver with an accident free record.
First I must say that your wife's driving would annoy me as well, but the thing is, she's never had an accident so what you're griping about is not that she is a dangerous driver but that her driving style annoys you.
There's a difference between being right about something and just preferring your own way.
As it stands it's a wonder my brother never throttled me when we were growing up. As the older sibling I gave plenty of unneeded "advice" over the years and we often had arguments because he would do the opposite of what I said just to piss me off.
Fortunately we grew up. I learned to have confidence in his judgement and he learned to appreciate that I really could help him out through my own prior experiences.
18164. thoughtful - 1/10/2006 11:41:39 PM Or perhaps the scarlett o'hara approach is what's needed
...oh I don't know Ashley, you're so big and strong and know so much more than I do. Why fiddle-dee-dee, I certainly can't bother my little head with such things. I'll leave it in your powerful hands. 18165. wonkers2 - 1/11/2006 1:37:37 AM Ms.NO--My way or the highway! 18166. Magoseph - 1/11/2006 2:37:56 AM Well, the man who wouldn’t listen has a badly splintered bone between his right elbow and the wrist. We waited a long time to be wedged between other people’s appointments; now the bone specialist has to look at the film. So tomorrow, we’ll know what’s what. 18167. wonkers2 - 1/11/2006 3:44:41 AM Ouch! Sorry to hear that. Guess you'll have to make a choice--between dog and spouse! (I shouldn't make light of the situation.) 18168. arkymalarky - 1/11/2006 5:06:36 AM My biggest concern about my parents' dog--which they absolutely adore--is that she'll trip them on their stairs or in their rocky yard.
But I've resigned myself to the fact that they love where they live and love their dog, and I may one day find Dad at the bottom of their pool--in his speedos. I just hope I get to him before the neighbors do. 18169. arkymalarky - 1/11/2006 5:09:07 AM I hope things go well with Flexy. Let us know how things go tomorrow. 18170. concerned - 1/11/2006 6:32:17 AM This is an area where women have an advantage over men. Men who have to be right are generally just assholes. 18171. alistairconnor - 1/11/2006 10:44:00 AM mmm... so you know women who have to be right, and aren't assholes?
There's a difference between being right about something and just preferring your own way.
That's part of what I was talking about... There are many techniques for handling the woman who is always right (let's postulate, for the sake of argument, that she's actually right 95% of the time).
* the damn-the-torpedoes approach -- I'll do it my way -- this is bad in practical terms (the guy will usually do the wrong thing), and not well-adapted to a long-term relationship
* the Yes-dear approach (anything for a quiet life) - this is the worst. The woman, over time, becomes perfectly convinced that she is 100% right all the time, and it breeds contempt for the schnock who can't make a correct decision on his own
* the reasonable-contestation approach. The guy will (for the sake of argument) usually be wrong in disagreeing, but occasionally he'll turn out to be right; and each can learn from the other. 18172. Magoseph - 1/11/2006 1:50:31 PM Guess you'll have to make a choice--between dog and spouse! (I shouldn't make light of the situation.)
Good advice, Wonk, thank you, but I doubt that Flex will consent to separate from him. The thing to do from now on is for me to take the dog out for his exercise walks and retrain him to heel.
I hope things go well with Flexy. Let us know how things go tomorrow.
Thanks, Arky.
18173. Magoseph - 1/11/2006 1:54:11 PM The fact is that women never cease to try to "improve" their men.
You may have a point, Pelle, about most women, but for me, all I want to improve in Flex is his state of health so that I can enjoy his delightful presence at my side. 18174. PelleNilsson - 1/11/2006 2:58:09 PM But what does Flex want? 18175. Magoseph - 1/11/2006 3:00:25 PM To live as long as possible, Pelle, that's his fervent desire. 18176. thoughtful - 1/11/2006 3:39:02 PM Ouch that sounds terribly painful. My sympathies to Flexy. 18177. PelleNilsson - 1/11/2006 5:07:11 PM Indeed.
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