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18168. arkymalarky - 1/11/2006 5:06:36 AM My biggest concern about my parents' dog--which they absolutely adore--is that she'll trip them on their stairs or in their rocky yard.
But I've resigned myself to the fact that they love where they live and love their dog, and I may one day find Dad at the bottom of their pool--in his speedos. I just hope I get to him before the neighbors do. 18169. arkymalarky - 1/11/2006 5:09:07 AM I hope things go well with Flexy. Let us know how things go tomorrow. 18170. concerned - 1/11/2006 6:32:17 AM This is an area where women have an advantage over men. Men who have to be right are generally just assholes. 18171. alistairconnor - 1/11/2006 10:44:00 AM mmm... so you know women who have to be right, and aren't assholes?
There's a difference between being right about something and just preferring your own way.
That's part of what I was talking about... There are many techniques for handling the woman who is always right (let's postulate, for the sake of argument, that she's actually right 95% of the time).
* the damn-the-torpedoes approach -- I'll do it my way -- this is bad in practical terms (the guy will usually do the wrong thing), and not well-adapted to a long-term relationship
* the Yes-dear approach (anything for a quiet life) - this is the worst. The woman, over time, becomes perfectly convinced that she is 100% right all the time, and it breeds contempt for the schnock who can't make a correct decision on his own
* the reasonable-contestation approach. The guy will (for the sake of argument) usually be wrong in disagreeing, but occasionally he'll turn out to be right; and each can learn from the other. 18172. Magoseph - 1/11/2006 1:50:31 PM Guess you'll have to make a choice--between dog and spouse! (I shouldn't make light of the situation.)
Good advice, Wonk, thank you, but I doubt that Flex will consent to separate from him. The thing to do from now on is for me to take the dog out for his exercise walks and retrain him to heel.
I hope things go well with Flexy. Let us know how things go tomorrow.
Thanks, Arky.
18173. Magoseph - 1/11/2006 1:54:11 PM The fact is that women never cease to try to "improve" their men.
You may have a point, Pelle, about most women, but for me, all I want to improve in Flex is his state of health so that I can enjoy his delightful presence at my side. 18174. PelleNilsson - 1/11/2006 2:58:09 PM But what does Flex want? 18175. Magoseph - 1/11/2006 3:00:25 PM To live as long as possible, Pelle, that's his fervent desire. 18176. thoughtful - 1/11/2006 3:39:02 PM Ouch that sounds terribly painful. My sympathies to Flexy. 18177. PelleNilsson - 1/11/2006 5:07:11 PM Indeed. 18178. Ms. No - 1/11/2006 6:10:10 PM AC,
There are many ways for handling people who always think they're alwyas right, but that isn't really where we started from.
Thoughtful brought up a situation in which it was ridiculous and insulting for her husband to question her judgement and Magoseph brought up a situation in which her advice was very wise and ignoring it caused a painful injury.
Now, in which case are we dealing with a woman who is always right in the sense I suspect you're alluding to where she's truly right only as often and perhaps less often than the men around her but insists on having her way anyway?
18179. Ms. No - 1/11/2006 6:11:11 PM Mago,
Owie, my best to Flexy for a speedy recovery. If his arm is fractured then you'll certainly be walking Butch on your own for awhile. ;-> 18180. alistairconnor - 1/11/2006 6:40:50 PM No, No, I'm talking about the fairly common situation in which a woman is endowed with a larger dose of common sense than her male partner. I'm not saying this is universally the case, only that it's a common state of affairs, and one which I have no particular problem with : after all, it has been demonstrated that men's and women's brains work somewhat differently on a biochemical level.
I am in no way attempting a blanket defense of male disobedience. Clearly, in neither of the cited cases could the "reasonable-contestation" defense be invoked. 18181. alistairconnor - 1/11/2006 6:41:56 PM Anyway. The idea that men are perfectible is overrated. 18182. Ms. No - 1/11/2006 7:23:19 PM Ah, okay, I totally misunderstood, sorry!
I think the idea that humans are perfectible shows the boundless optimism of the species in a general sense, but on an individual level it's terribly unrealistic and mostly a waste of time.
Your third option is definitely the best bet. It provides the course of least resentment in the long run. 18183. alistairconnor - 1/11/2006 7:32:42 PM But my advice on male-female relations is of negative net worth... 18184. Ms. No - 1/11/2006 8:15:13 PM That's silly. Even Babe Ruth lost some games. ;-> 18185. thoughtful - 1/11/2006 8:50:23 PM Actually, it's not at all clear to me that women have more common sense than men. In my biased opinion, it's only that women are more likely to be outspoken about what they think than men. My husband's way of dealing with the situation is instead of speaking up or mentioning anything, he'll let it go to hell and then make a remark like, "I thought you were handling it." Like him sitting in the kitchen with the cookies obviously burning to a crisp inside the oven and saying nothing. 5 min later when I wander back into the kitchen having completely lost track of time, smelling the burning cookies, racing to get them out of the oven, cookies flying everywhere and I look at him exasperated and say,"Why didn't you say something?!?" He'll respond, "Oh, I thought you were handling it."
AARRGGHHH! 18186. PelleNilsson - 1/11/2006 10:07:32 PM There is another way of looking at this. Obviously you were handling this task. You were also mishandling it by "having completely lost track of time". You needed to be taught a lesson not to flit around doing this and that and losing focus on the task at hand.
In other words, my dear thoughtful, you need to be perfected. 18187. Magoseph - 1/11/2006 10:34:04 PM In contrast, I had in the past several dogs, two boys prone to injuries, and a husband who liked dangerous sports. Therefore, I was in the right, as Ms. No pointed out, to warn Flex about giving too much leeway to Butch. In other words, dear thoughtful, I am the perfect person to give advice to old men and their dogs.
Thank you all for your good wishes to Flex. We’re going to the hospital tomorrow morning for the the cast.
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