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15577. Ms. No - 6/21/2005 5:00:26 PM If you're going to spend your dotage there, don't let them put you up on the second floor unless they install a lift of some kind. 15578. Magoseph - 6/21/2005 5:28:07 PM I won’t be spending my dotage there—I’d rather live in my car or under a bridge than being a burden to my sons, Ms. No. Last year in spring, I was so upset with Flexy not listening to me about his health that I decided to scare the hell out of him, saying-- that’s it, I am leaving you! Discussing the whole thing with my daughter-in-law, I realized that if I wanted to move in with her and my son, I could do it—she’d be happy and so would he. I emigrated here because mainly I knew that I’d never be very independent of family if I stayed home. My father and mother’s families were so large and meddling, I could hav never escaped them, especially in having an uncle a major in the police and another one in the republican guard—these two guys found me even thought I had not registered in any embassy or consulate in this country and I didn’t want to be found yet. I’m still outraged at their nerve when I think about it. 15579. Ms. No - 6/21/2005 5:49:08 PM I count myself very fortunate in my family. It's large and loving but not intrusive.
I realize I'd better keep close with my nephews, though, or nobody's going to come visit me in the rest home when I'm 90. ;-> 15580. Magoseph - 6/21/2005 5:59:02 PM I certainly won't be able to visityou by then, but you can visit me in mine. 15581. thoughtful - 6/21/2005 5:59:28 PM We have no children and my nephew i wouldn't entrust to care for my cat, let alone me. So my only alternative is to be independently wealthy and afford the care I'd like to receive in my dotage.
That reminds me...I better go buy a lottery ticket... 15582. Magoseph - 6/21/2005 6:49:37 PM We won't even care how we live by then, thoughtful. 15583. thoughtful - 6/21/2005 7:11:43 PM Somehow, i'd like to be as hopeful as you, mags, but i've seen too many elderly people too easily mistreated and taken advantage of to feel comfortable with that.
Then again, I plan on living healthy for at least another 40-50 years, so the generation that will be caring for me hasn't even been born yet! 15584. Magoseph - 6/21/2005 7:51:05 PM I'll probably make it to 90 or more if I inherited the family's genes, but I'm not sure I want to live that long. I should think that by that time, I would be tired to be around--probably being a pain to everyone around me and what is worse, not realizing I am. 15585. Magoseph - 6/21/2005 7:56:19 PM The lawn mower conked out--now Flexy is on his way to get another one--the lawn boy went to town to get us some ice-cream in the meantime. Flexy is certainly hopeful that he will live for a long time--he plans to buy a lawn-mower that I think will outlive him and maybe me too. 15586. thoughtful - 6/21/2005 8:40:52 PM Sigh.
Hubby and I have been married for 27 years. Our anniversary was last friday.
Why is it that we only ever have the same 5 disagreements? Why is it that we are unable to ever resolve them?
Not that they're critical to our relationship...they're the stupid little things. But they're so stupid and so little, you'd think we would grow past them. But no. They are perennial.
Like now. He's painting the foyer. I knew he would complain about the satin finish on the paint because he thinks it's too shiny. But I need that finish to be able to do the glazing treatment I want. He of course doesn't want me to do a glaze treatment. He wants wallpaper. I don't. So instead he's painting, but he's complaining. "It's way too shiny. This MUST be the wrong paint." But it isn't. Sometimes I just wish he weren't quite so predictable.
But I suppose he wishes the same about me... 15587. alistairConnor - 6/21/2005 9:29:23 PM Congratulations Thoughtful... 27 years and still tolerating each other.
Me and the Mrs called it a day this morning. After a mere 19 years of marriage, 21 years together. We now have the opportunity to form mature adult relationships.
Yes I'm out of the closet now. I'm divorced and I'm... well not exactly proud, no. 15588. wonkers2 - 6/21/2005 10:20:31 PM Free at last! Free at last! 15589. wonkers2 - 6/21/2005 10:21:19 PM And, besides that, he's a Republican! 15590. thoughtful - 6/21/2005 10:22:35 PM So sorry to hear that AC. And at the risk of sounding like a neil sedaca song, breaking up IS hard to do, especially after so many years of marriage.
My gf from when I was a wee one has invited us to her wedding on Sat...it's her second, the first one having lasted 24 years and 3 children.
They do say love is better the second time around... 15591. wonkers2 - 6/21/2005 10:28:17 PM Yes, AC, excuse me for being flippant. I hope it works out for the best for all concerned. 15592. judithathome - 6/21/2005 11:29:23 PM They do say love is better the second time around...
Alistair, I can attest to this and I'm sure Magoseph can, too. I was so young when I married the first time and my ex once told me he knew I was young but he thought he would have more say in how I turned out...fortunately, after 18 years and one child, I met a man who was thrilled, rather than dismayed, at how I turned out.
It may seem sad now but you two have had wonderful children together so all is not in vain and they should be the number one priority for you both, as I'm sure they are. Look on this as a passage in your lives, with a connecting cord, and both of you move on to the next stage in your lives.
15593. alistairConnor - 6/21/2005 11:42:48 PM Wise words Judith... In retrospect we hung on too long to a failed relationship, and all four of us suffered from it. The kids are alright, and the divorce is going better than the marriage did... we've learned a lot I'm sure.
Thanks for the flippancy, Wonk. 15594. arkymalarky - 6/22/2005 1:50:15 AM Wow, congrats, Thoughtful, on 27 years. Our next will be 22. We improved with time, thankfully, or we wouldn't have endured. Still, I know what you mean about the same stuff cropping up. One of my colleagues whose since moved on to other things had a Peanuts' poster in her classroom of Lucy in her typical arms-folded stance, with the caption, "Save time. See it my way." I always think of Bob and me when I see that poster. 15595. arkymalarky - 6/22/2005 1:51:59 AM That's a great metaphor, Judith. 15596. Macnas - 6/22/2005 8:16:29 AM Alistair, a chara na n-àrann, I hope everything goes well for you.
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