|
18398. thoughtful - 2/2/2006 11:31:33 PM Thanks judithah...worse part is i'll be travelling on business the day he's going to the docs. Though I doubt we'll find anything definitive that day.
Then on top of it, the decision about what to do if it is cancer is up in the air, depending on how aggressive it is. The cost/benefit of surgery isn't good in terms of injured nerves.
My old secy went through it...lost her father to it and her husband had the same thing and with poor doc and bad effects, ended up losing his bladder and now uses a bag.
But another fellow i know ended up having some elevated psa's and a biopsy and it was benign.
I hate waiting.
I hate not knowing.
I hate not being able to do anything to fix it right away.
Argh. 18399. wonkers2 - 2/2/2006 11:47:30 PM A couple of suggestions. Men who are diagnosed with prostate cancer can usually afford to take their time before deciding on a treatment modality. There is plenty of time for a second or third opinion. And many recommend a second pathology report on the biopsy because a small difference in the pathologist's report which assigns a grade to the cancer. The most common method of grading is called a Gleason Score which is an indication of the size of the cancer and an indication (not certainty) of whether or not it has spread beyond the prostate.
There are basically three types of treatment: watchful waiting, surgery, and radiation therapy. Urologists nearly always recommend surgery. Why? Because that's what they do and how they make their money. However, depending on the diagnosis, radiation can be an equally curative treatment, usually with fewer side effects. Few urologists will tell you that, however. Moreover, there is a wide range of skill among prostate cancer surgeons. The best surgeons (Johns Hopkins, eg)have a significantly better batting average for avoiding surgical side effects due to nerve damage. (Many believe that their higher batting average is due, in part, to patient selection, i.e., cherry picking the easiest cases.)
If your husband's biopsy indicates cancer, I would strongly urge him to go to a comprehensive cancer center (there are five or ten in the country, as I recall)and thoroughly explore all his options before starting treatment. (I went through this process two years ago and spent nearly a year before deciding on radiation therapy. I'm very happy with my decision--I've experienced only minimal side effects, and my PSA has returned almost to zero. I was treated by Dr. Jeffrey Forman at the Karmanos Cancer center's branch in Farmington Hills, Michigan. Dr. Forman is one of the most impressive physicians I've ever encountered.) I would be happy to discuss my experience with your husband should he want to do so. And you will find a wealth of information on the Internet. 18400. arkymalarky - 2/3/2006 12:52:07 AM I'll be thinking about y'all, Thoughtful, and Wonk that's a very helpful post that every man (including my husband) ought to know. 18401. TheWizardOfWhimsy - 2/3/2006 1:27:01 AM A wonderful and most generous post, wonk. I have a good friend who had the surgery (with no side effects), thoughtful. He's closer to your home and I'd be happy to give you his name if the need arises. Until then, every good wish for a negative biopsy.
Got back from Siena and Rome last night. The show was more successful than anyone expected. 18402. wonkers2 - 2/3/2006 1:47:04 AM Correction/addition: because a small difference in the pathology report "can mean a significant difference in the prognosis and treatment. Moreover, from what I could learn, pathology reports don't provide a definitive conclusion on whether or how aggressive the cancer is. Fortunately, most prostate cancers are not very aggressive. As I recall, the younger the age at diagnosis the more likely the cancer is aggressive. But the best they can do is an educated guess." 18403. arkymalarky - 2/3/2006 4:40:57 AM Congratulations, Wiz! And I would have expected it would be very successful. I think we're very privileged to get to virtually, so to speak, enjoy your work. 18404. wonkers2 - 2/3/2006 5:26:44 AM DITTO. How about posting some of the paintings or a link! 18405. TheWizardOfWhimsy - 2/3/2006 2:52:41 PM Thanks ark and wonk.. I've been trying to get some images of the first trip up on Shutterfly, since November, but haven't had any time. I'm getting to hate travel for it's disruptions and postponements. 18406. Magoseph - 2/3/2006 2:53:35 PM Wonk, Flex thinks you covered very well the prostate situation and he should know since he underwent the same 12 years ago.
Thoughtful, we both are thinking of your husband and you. 18407. thoughtful - 2/3/2006 2:58:12 PM Thank you all for the kind words and wonks, that is most helpful and encouraging information. Wiz, I may just take you up on your offer as you are definitely closer to my home than Michigan.
I've been thinking about all the ways my husband has enriched my life for all of my life and the thought of living without him is most intolerable. I know it will probably happen some day, but not now. Not yet. Not when we still have so much living to do.
18408. alistairconnor - 2/3/2006 3:43:37 PM Oh, gee Tful, that's quite some weekend in perspective.
I hope it goes well on Tuesday. 18409. wabbit - 2/3/2006 4:13:20 PM T'ful, you and your husband have all my best wishes. Please keep us posted. 18410. thoughtful - 2/3/2006 4:23:19 PM Thanks A/c and wabbit...I certainly will keep you posted. 18411. TheWizardOfWhimsy - 2/3/2006 4:32:42 PM Thoughtful, the anxiety is the worst part of it all because it's like a feedback loop that drives one to the brink. Try to remember that there is no way to know what is down the road. If you always focus on the moment, you won't get trapped in the loop.
My friend Larry is 59 and had just retired as a school psychologist. He was devistated to learn that he had to deal with this problem, rather than fly fishing in Montana for the next twenty summers as he'd expected. Nevertheless, he did his homework and found the best urologist in the Hartford area to evaluate his situation.
Larry and his wife just got back from a photo safari in Kenya. Low psa, no side effects. Take each day as it comes and know that there is lots of help out there with great odds for success. 18412. thoughtful - 2/3/2006 6:30:12 PM Smooch!
Thanks Wiz. You're a peach. 18413. PsychProf - 2/3/2006 7:26:39 PM Excellent post by Wiz... 18414. TheWizardOfWhimsy - 2/3/2006 11:34:08 PM Fagedaboudit!
Siena was damp and cold as only a medieval city can be, but these posters helped and made me feel like a temporary rock star.
 18415. wabbit - 2/3/2006 11:55:39 PM Gorgeous! 18416. thoughtful - 2/4/2006 12:01:40 AM How nice!
What's with the michael jackson bit? 18417. TheWizardOfWhimsy - 2/4/2006 12:20:11 AM Ha! I had to adjust the camera for the diplomat who took the picture and hadn't had time to put the other glove back on--very good pickup there, tful!
|
