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26923. msgreer - 5/19/2012 4:41:22 AM Hey webfeet..isn't it comforting to type in www.themote.com and find that your friends are not only still here..they welcome you back with love and sincerity. 26924. Wombat - 5/19/2012 4:44:05 PM Wombette's prom was last night. Three surprises: she went, she had a date (reasonably housetrained), and she appears to have enjoyed herself. She traditionally does not like mob scenes with loud music, hates dressing up, and has shown no apparent interest in boys other than as chums (her date was a pal from theater tech crew, so that holds up). 26925. arkymalarky - 5/19/2012 5:31:31 PM I still regret not having gone to mine. Glad she went and had fun. I feel the same way she does about dressing up, etc, but having planned and attended them over 30 years as a teacher, I have more appreciation for them and what they do for kids. I rarely go unless I'm sponsoring one, every six years, but I always expect to dislike them and end up enjoying them. I did my last one two years ago. Don't plan to be teaching by the next one, but who knows.
Btw, Wombat, is your email the same (assuming I can find it) or can you hit me up at cmoon.rise@gmail.com? 26926. Wombat - 5/19/2012 9:48:39 PM I missed out on mine, thanks to stupid teenage male thinking. My "girlfriend" and I were planning on going, ordered the tux, etc. Then I decided I wanted to ask someone else, so I did. She said no, and my "girlfriend" went with someone else. I got stuck with the tux, and was denied my diploma until I paid the rental fee.
On Prom night, I hung out with friends--of both genders--and we drank beer and shot the breeze. 26927. vonKreedon - 5/19/2012 11:23:08 PM Interesting quote msgreer, and topical for me at the moment. Last night at 11 my schizophrenic, and at times mildly violent, brother, I'll call him Kevin, showed up at our door with no notice. Last we knew he was in the D.C. area, where our Mom, step Dad, and other brother, I'll call him Mark, live. My Mom and Dad have a restraining order on him and our brother is living with them because, among other things, Kevin destroyed the apartment that he and Mark lived in together. Kevin stopped taking his meds over a year ago and so is out of control.
Anyway, there's a knock on the door and there's Kevin on our porch looking demon haunted and saying how he needs to stay with us because he's got seven or eight interviews for work. I invited him to come in and sit in the living room while Blair and I talked this over in our bedroom. We agreed that we would not let him stay, but that we would subsidize him a hotel to the tune of about $300 worth of hotel room. It never got that far. As I walked into the kitchen, where Kevin was getting a glass of water, I realized that the first thing I needed to know was if he was taking his meds. Then I realized that there was little chance he was and that in all likelihood he'd blow up as soon as I asked the question and then probably leave. I asked and he blew up and left on foot. We called and talked to the police, but nothing else has happened as yet.
Scary and tragic, but yes, it was definitely a time that you say no out of love versus yes out of fear; love of not only Kevin, but the rest of my family, and fear not only of Kevin, but also of feeling like the cold-hearted bastard he was yelling, "Fuck You!" at as he left. 26928. Wombat - 5/20/2012 2:29:32 AM Yikes! 26929. thoughtful - 5/20/2012 3:15:43 PM We had a bit of excitement the other night....neighbor's house caught fire...yeah a tragedy. Everyone got out ok. But how stupid can you be? The guy had a stock pile of hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of illegal fireworks in the house. The place was non stop explosions for over 20 minutes...then the stragglers continued to explode for hours later. I mean he put Macy's to shame! The firemen and police wisely took cover while the house continued to explode and burn. We were so fortunate as to have had an inch of rain recently so the woods around the house didn't burn. Neighbor in the house right next door spent the night with us as they wouldn't let her go home until the next day....they kept finding so many unexploded shells. Yikes! 26930. Wombat - 5/20/2012 4:08:06 PM Mega-yikes! 26931. msgreer - 5/22/2012 4:26:53 PM Do exactly what you would do if you felt most secure.”
-Meister Eckhart
Today I am not feeling all that secure. I am not happy with the medical profession but isn't that where I left off?
My daughter had her annual mammogram yesterday at a facility I went to only because her gyn deliveries babies there.Other wise I don't go near it.
She got through the mammogram but the radiologist saw something in her right breast and asked for an ultrasound She did that as well.
Then he wanted to come in to the ultrasound room and speak with my daugther, J. I told the technician that is not happening..if he wants to talk to anyone it will me.
So I step into his small office where he tells me he still sees something and can not say it is just a cyst. He wants to do a MRI next.
Never one to be shy I said absolutely not.I want a second opinion, say at Dana-Farber because I know the protocol when one gets to this stage and it is not a MRI.
No sleep last night. I did call her new gyn this morning only to find that she is off today..so I have to wait until tomorrow to tell her to get all the films to Dana-Farber where a radiologist, who does nothing but look at women's mammogram and ultrasound films, have a look at it.
Now I had a list of to do today but it is raining and I am going on no sleep. My best friends, Ben and Jerry stopped over last night.
Okay, the gyn is off today so I start in tomorrow.
There is no way this is cancer. My daughter and I have fibro cystic disease and each year the mammograms and ultrasounds show it.
The best thing for me today..stay under the covers..read about new journeys in life, read Carole Kings memoirs, which was given to me for my BD and again stay under the covers and talk to my friends here.
26932. alistairconnor - 5/22/2012 4:34:13 PM hi folks, no webfeet it's not me keeping the lights on, it's our beloved wabbit. I'm a deserter.
Love you all... special mention for Judith, wishes of strength and wellness.
I saw my mother at Christmas, she's well down the Alzheimer road. She knew who I was and was pleased to see me, but I don't think she could have put a name to me. She doesn't finish sentences, in fact mostly she repeats phrases, or reads them aloud from anything in her surroundings. She seemed happy, with all her family around her, but it's not Christmas every day.
Took the daughters to Italy over the long weekend : Milan, we'd never been there. We have this squalid holiday routine where we park in some unlikely place to sleep (it's a small camper van), so we were stalking round elegantissimo Milan, shopping and museuming, for three days without having a shower. The weather wasn't great so we probably didn't smell too bad.
At the end of the long drive home, I was catching up with my elder daughter, who I don't see very often (she's finishing her first year of university, in Avignon). We have only recently re-established a strong loving relationship, after a couple of difficult years. She seems to have made a lot of friends, and I asked if there was a "special" boy (I nearly said "or girl", out of political correctness). As far as anyone knows, she was a virgin when she finished high school.
So she says, she'd had a couple of flings with guys at the beginning of the university year, but she's been with a girl for a month now.
It was completely unexpected, but I wasn't surprised. 26933. msgreer - 5/22/2012 4:35:33 PM vonKreedon, Your real life story with your brother sure does come together with the quote I posted.
That had to be a very painful experience. I know I have stated the obvious but what choice did you have? It is so sad to hear that your brother is having a battle with drugs. That said, I agree with how you handled the situation and your decision to give him $300 toward a hotel room.
It sounds like a no win life situation. You and your family should not have to live in fear because of your brother's problems, especially since there has been such a long history of drug abuse.
It is hard to find the right words but I can say that I agree with how you handled the situation.
When is it time for life to slow down and the problems to stop filling our plates? 26934. vonKreedon - 5/22/2012 6:22:05 PM Thanks msgreer, yeah there was nothing else to do. I wish he'd been able to hear the question about taking his meds and not blown up and stormed out, I'd have liked to put him up in a hotel, but on the other hand it's a relief not to have him around. 26935. vonKreedon - 5/22/2012 6:22:47 PM Hey AC - Nice to get an update. How's your daughter liking Avingnon? I'd love to live there for a year or two myself. 26936. msgreer - 5/22/2012 6:37:34 PM vonFreedon, It is understandable that you have reached your limit, and realize that you can do no more. The ball is in your brother's court. You know I have a tendency to run toward someone iike your brother but I have learned that your life and your parent's life matter. It is such a hard decision to make. I pray that your brother will get help. You have done everything you can. You have your life]to live, and it is good to hear that you are doing that. Your parents must be in a constant state of angst. I wish you well and hope one day your brother sees what life can give him. It is a very tough situation. 26937. msgreer - 5/22/2012 6:38:57 PM
Please excuse my spelling.
26938. thoughtful - 5/23/2012 4:52:32 AM MsG, thank you for your story. I am going through something similar. Every time I get a mammo I get a call back for an ultrasound. So now I get the ultrasound with the mammo and here they go, calling me back again. I went through this for years with the same spot on left breast with always a call back and it's always the same GD cyst. So I yelled at them last year....so they called me back for a spot on the right breast. So this year, I go again, mammo, ultrasound and a call back again for the right breast. Aren't they supposed to review last year's if they see something to compare if it has changed??? I swear they cry wolf every time just to keep their machines and their wallets filled. It is very damaging as now I never want to go back and never believe their results...yet left with the nagging, "what if it's something this time?" I see gyno next week and will discuss it with her.
Oh...did I mention the screening mammo and ultrasound are free...but the follow ups are not??? 26939. msgreer - 5/23/2012 5:36:09 AM I don't agree the radiologist knows what he is talking about. He does not have any of my daughters prior ultrasounds or mammogram. If he did he would understand what I do.J has fibro cystic breasts and she always shows that but no one has said to get a MRI. I have to agree with you about lining his pockets. I felt that way myself.
I am sorry this has happen to you. It's scary. The ass was on his way to talk to J on his own before I stopped the technician and said, you talk to me not my daughter...unless you want to instill the fear of God in her.
Either way, as you pointed out, it is a pain. Last week her gyn told her she felt "Normal Breast Tissue" during her examine. Grrrr. I still have to get a hold of the gyn and have her send it off to either Florida where she has yearso of ultrasounds or to Dana-Farber as it is closer, but they don't have any of her past films...Grrr 26940. alistairconnor - 5/23/2012 9:37:22 AM Hey Kree -- yes Avignon is pretty cool. She's got a little flat in an old house within the city walls, a few hundred yards from school, so she goes everywhere on foot, or by public bicycle. She's studying "communication" -- sounds vague, but they get a good theoretical foundation, Derrida, Deleuze and what have you, and it's a good grounding for specialisation in journalism, or cultural management, or advertising, among other things. She chose the school because all the other possibilities were very business oriented, and she is definite about wanting to work in a creative field, which is what I want to hear.
A few years ago, my stepson was getting into all sorts of trouble, had an alcohol problem (at 15), and was subject to wild bursts of rage that went way beyond "anger management". We discovered that there is an extensive history in his father's family of both schizophrenia and bipolarity. We put him under treatment, one of the anti-psychotic drugs that are used for both, which helped with the behavioural issues, but it seems to work by making you stupid, and he hated taking his dope. I was pretty much convinced that we would be managing him for the rest of our lives, in the best case, and that more likely he would get out of control at some point.
But he's pulled through. He hasn't taken the dope for a couple of years now (he's stopped doing the other sort of dope too, though he still has an alcohol problem, to my mind). He has learned to manage his antisocial tendencies. Luckily he has a heart of gold and a great personality, so I'm pretty sure he'll be OK.
We were lucky, I suppose, that his chemical imbalance isn't too severe. But I like to think that by holding on to him, pulling him back from the brink repeatedly, having faith in him, and holding him to account for his actions, we have enabled him to save himself by gradually taking responsibility for himself. 26941. thoughtful - 5/23/2012 12:55:01 PM vonK, I posted the link to this article in health thread...saw this and thought of your brother:
Many schizophrenia patients show shrinkage in parts of their cerebral cortex, and Flegr thinks the protozoan may be to blame for that. He hands me a recently published paper on the topic that he co-authored with colleagues at Charles University, including a psychiatrist named Jiri Horacek. Twelve of 44 schizophrenia patients who underwent MRI scans, the team found, had reduced gray matter in the brain—and the decrease occurred almost exclusively in those who tested positive for T. gondii. After reading the abstract, I must look stunned, because Flegr smiles and says, “Jiri had the same response. I don’t think he believed it could be true.” When I later speak with Horacek, he admits to having been skeptical about Flegr’s theory at the outset. When they merged the MRI results with the infection data, however, he went from being a doubter to being a believer. “I was amazed at how pronounced the effect was,” he says. “To me that suggests the parasite may trigger schizophrenia in genetically susceptible people.” 26942. thoughtful - 5/23/2012 1:05:47 PM AC, I posted the above before i read your last post...you'll probably find the article interesting as well.
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