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7615. judithathome - 4/3/2012 10:21:13 PM Meditation is impossible for me because as soon as they say "clear your mind and focus on nothing", I'm out...I cannot clear my mind...I cannot stop "hearing" every conversation going on around me...I can't "not" hear other stuff. (For instance, while I'm writing this, I'm listening to the Alex Wagner show and following Ed Rendell and Rachel Maddow talking about the Bush adminstration and the Iraq war....)
When I was in therapy with a psychoanalyst, he was amazed that I couldn't focus on "nothing."..it was an alien concept to me. I hear everything around me. 7616. vonKreedon - 4/3/2012 11:09:04 PM The key is to start by listening to your breath. Concentrate on breathing perfectly and tune everything out but the experience of your breath. It helps to turn off the TV/Radio/Music. 7617. judithathome - 4/3/2012 11:16:53 PM I don't listen to music/radio and when I turn off TV, I still can't "clear my thinking"...it is just impossible for me to stop "hearing"...I'm not exaggerating; I've had doctors try to get me "clear"...it doesn't happen. 7618. judithathome - 4/3/2012 11:19:19 PM When we are at a restaurant, I can hear and follow converastions taking place all around me. I can read a book and follow a program taking place on TV while I'm doing so...I can do a crossword puzzle and follow the plot of a movie going on at the same time. 7619. arkymalarky - 4/3/2012 11:21:48 PM Different people are different and it really helps to find what techniques work for you in what circumstances. That's where a counselor really helped me. She gave me ways to navigate and juggle responsibilities in a really busy time. Normally I'd get it all done, but then collapse, usually with a major infection. I didn't use meditation, but did some relaxation exercises a few times. What I did do was follow her advice on pacing, keeping on track, and preventing becoming overwhelmed with the multiple things I had going on, not just that project. She also helped with perspective at different stages of the process. 7620. vonKreedon - 4/3/2012 11:29:29 PM When I've meditated, haven't for years, it takes me quite a while, as in days to weeks, before I ever get to that state of no-mind and then when I do it only last a moment or two before my brain notices and goes "Whoo-Hoo!" and completely breaks the experience. But I find the exercise of trying to reach that space, listening to my breath and letting my mind go as it will while I do, I find that very relaxing and centering. 7621. arkymalarky - 4/3/2012 11:32:49 PM I'm the opposite. When I'm involved in anything I'm totally oblivious. Drives Stan nuts. 7622. arkymalarky - 4/3/2012 11:33:38 PM Opposite of Judith, that is. 7623. thoughtful - 4/4/2012 2:26:46 PM Actually, then, perhaps you haven't been doing the right kind of meditation or not understanding what it is. The kind of meditation that has been successful is something called mindfulness meditation. It is all about not pre-living what is to come or re-living what has happened in the past, but increasing your awareness of the moment now. Bringing your attention to whatever it is that is happening now. Using your breath (or sometimes something else) as an anchor to return to when your mind wanders off, which it will. It's understanding that whatever happens during your meditation is fine as that's what was supposed to happen. It is about being aware of what is happening now...physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally. It is about increasing awareness.
If, for example, you are hearing sounds or noises around you, just notice them, but don't react. They are part of your current meditation experience.
Part of what this mindful awareness does is separate you from yourself so that whatever you are experiencing becomes something that is happening to you, but it isn't you. So if you are in pain, you can be the being that recognizes that your body feels the pain, but you are not the pain itself. If you are aware of and noticing your anxiety, then you are not the anxiety itself.
7624. thoughtful - 4/4/2012 2:40:59 PM I think most people benefit from guided meditation as it helps them stay anchored on the process. Further, because of the deep relaxation associated with meditation, it allows for planting of subliminal suggestions, so some guided meditations, like the ones I did with the Chopra Institute recently can encourage you to live more wholesomely, respect your body with what you eat, bring your emotions and physical self into better balance so they can be more prescriptive. But not all of them are.
Here are some resources I suggest you pursue.
1/20/12 podcast of NPRs Science Friday, hour 1, about 9 minutes in is a conversation discussing this mindfulness book that includes a 3 minute mindfulness meditation.
This you tube video of Jon Kabat Zinn discussing and then leading a mindfulness meditation session at Google.
Meditation Oasis has a lot of info about meditation, and under podcasts they offer around 40 free guided meditations of various lengths about various topics, including pain, grief, stress, gratitude, peace, which are really helpful for beginner meditators. 7625. thoughtful - 4/4/2012 2:52:46 PM I would strongly encourage you to try this, even if you have had unsatisfactory experiences in the past. This is really more accessible than you may have been led to believe.
Meditation is an exercise or practice like any other. We don't watch marathon runners and expect to run 26 miles in the first day or so out. And while master meditators are able to have a horn go off next to their head without any physical reaction, most of us aren't going to spend the 10,000+ hours it takes to get there. That doesn't mean we can't benefit from whatever practice we accomplish.
7626. thoughtful - 4/4/2012 3:00:09 PM This being aware of what is going on and separating ourselves from what is happening, and living in the now creates a sense of control over our situation and with the different, broader perspective, it makes whatever we're experiencing more manageable. This is and of itself can be stress reducing.
Moreover, the process of deep relaxation that comes with the meditation allows various stresses and emotions to arise that we may not even be aware of. I have come out of meditations with tears on my face, though having no sense of sadness, but getting emotional release from strains I wasn't aware of. Others have left me feeling elated and able to accomplish anything. Each meditation is different and each is perfect as it is. All are beneficial.
And my meditation has also improved my sleep habits, which in and of itself has strong health benefits. 7627. Wombat - 4/4/2012 3:27:18 PM Concerned,
Harding was most likely killed by the Surgeon General (his own appointment, and a family friend). The Hardings were believers in medical quackery (in this case hydrotherapy), and ignored warnings from other doctors about the state of his heart. When Harding fell ill on in California, the Surgeon General diagnosed it as food poisoning and treated it with purgatives--just the thing for a bum ticker. The strain proved to be too much.
The secret medical history of US presidents is fascinating. Were you aware that President Cleveland--a heavy smoker--had a portion of his palate removed in a secret operation that took place in a yacht in New York harbor? 7628. concerned - 4/4/2012 6:49:44 PM Re. 7627 -
Thanks for the info, Wombat. I wasn't aware of that regarding Cleveland. When did he have that operation relative to his two separate terms as president? 7629. judithathome - 4/4/2012 7:41:45 PM Well, I'm back and so pissed...I thought this surgeon was going to do the biopsy today but discovered it was just an introductory appointment with her and she has to arrange for my biopsy at another facility....but luckily, I like this doctor. I'll be going back to her after the biopsy is done and we'll go from there.
So...more waiting. I'm just a wreck right now. 7630. thoughtful - 4/4/2012 8:14:37 PM That is so frustrating...I hope they will schedule soon. I always get so ticked when they tell you early detection is so important yet they take their time in actually doing anything for you!
When mother was dx'd with her lung cancer I did everything I could to speed up the surgery, but by the time they operated it was in her lymph nodes already. We'll never know if it would have mattered if they operated sooner.
Fingers crossed for you. 7631. arkymalarky - 4/5/2012 12:32:51 AM Grrr! Glad you like her. Hopefully she'll get you a fast appointment. 7632. thoughtful - 4/5/2012 12:49:18 AM Another benefit of meditation...increased blood flow to the brain and improved memory. As little as 12 minutes a day of meditation has beneficial effects. 7633. thoughtful - 4/5/2012 1:34:26 PM I think there is a correlation between the unresolved stresses in our life and illness, probably through the chemicals generated when under stress and the impact on our immune system. I believe my mother's cancer was aggravated by the traumas she experienced and never resolved. My cousin in his 40s just got testicular cancer after his wife of 15 years divorced him.
I believe this stress effect can be just as strong as the placebo effect, only in a negative way. Meditation, exercise, laughter, adequate sleep are all important stress reducers that can have a positive effect on our health. 7634. judithathome - 4/5/2012 7:28:25 PM Well, I'm agreeing with you 100%...my back feels like I did 2 hours of hard work out after being off from the gym for a year...I'm realizing that the achy muscles I'm experiencing today are because I was so tensed up yesterday.
(I know that's not what you were getting at but....)
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